


Writing romance is hard when your friends don't wanna fxck 2D men

by emoedgelord



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Christmas Gift Exchange, Current Timeline AU, F/M, adulting au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-29
Updated: 2019-12-29
Packaged: 2021-02-19 08:21:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22007959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emoedgelord/pseuds/emoedgelord
Summary: for some reason my friends and i decided to do a fic exchange for christmas this year. so i wrote them living their best shoujo lives with their anime boyfriends.enjoy my attempts at writing, i guess.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Original Female Character(s), Kuroo Tetsurou/Original Female Character(s), Oikawa Tooru/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 2





	Writing romance is hard when your friends don't wanna fxck 2D men

**Author's Note:**

> merry christmas hoes, i'm actually posting it.
> 
> also if you like kny and pokemon, then check out this [ pokemon au ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21178439/chapters/50412023) my friend wrote bc it's really good

Hands deep in his pockets, Kuroo trudges along the familiar route to his girlfriend’s house, absentmindedly kicking at the loose pebbles along the way. Kenma had decided to abandon him again for the new Pokémon game that was released just last weekend. And now that he thinks about it, that was also the last time he had seen his best friend, and they live together! The audacity of the man.

Volleyball practice had been cancelled for the next few days since both coaches were out of town and honestly, the middle blocker was happy for the slight reprieve. Sure, he loved the sport just as much as the next player, but he greatly appreciated not drowning himself in a tub full of ice every day after practice due to the aching pain of bruises and sore muscles.

He absentmindedly rubs at his forearms, at the still fading bruise from being on the receiving end of Lev’s spikes, from yesterday’s practice match. The Russian had come a long way compared to his first year in high school. It was getting harder and more painful to block or receive his spikes. He smiles fondly at the memory that then drops to frown, movements halted, at the sight before him. Gazing up the driveway of the house, he noticed that his girlfriend’s car was missing.

Well that’s weird, he thought, checking his watch, noting that he had completed all his activity rings for the day, before refocusing on a much more pressing matter. She normally would be home on the weekends, and yet she wasn’t. He frowns, reaching deep within the pockets of his sweatpants, to pull out his phone to double check to see if he did send her the text saying he was coming over this weekend. The screen comes to life, illuminating a picture of the two of them, side by side, proudly showing off their paintings to each other. The picture was taken a few weeks back, during their most recent date night. Christine had dragged him to a paint night, at a place just down the street from where he lives, and while he didn’t have much talent in arts and crafts, seeing his girlfriend’s face light up as she was telling him all about it and how much fun they’ll have, making his big dumb heart go all soft and mushy. He didn’t have the heart in him to say no. God, the lengths he would go for just to see her genuinely laugh and smile, not the fake one she displays for all the world to see.

To him, she was the sun, in that up to this moment, she is at the highest point of his life, that at times he’s only looked on to her in frustration, that despite feeling the harsh rays, he couldn’t help but look back at the beauty she brings, wanting nothing more than to sit in the glow that she brings to his life. Like a blind man seeing the sun for the first time, he craved for it as it warmed his chilled heart. And like the sun that rises and sets every day, he’d love nothing more than to begin and end his days with her.

Shaking his head to clear his mind of distractions, he scrolls through his messages, frowning slightly when he notices that she hadn’t responded to his most recent text.

A text he sent three days ago.

Her watch literally notifies her every time a text goes through.

What the fuck, man.

This is fine. Maybe she’s just busy, that’s all. He had been busy the last few days too.

His thumb hovers over her name, before deciding against it. He didn’t want to appear clingy and while he was annoyed at the lack of responses, he should just let it be. Yes, that’s it.

It’s fine.

Life was not all daijoubu and rainbows.

Despite giving her, her much needed personal space, she should at the very least, still send back a reply to let him know that she’s ignoring him, to put his mind at ease, instead of wondering if he ever did something wrong. As much as he tries to understand her and go at her pace, he still finds himself stumbling blindly, reaching for her, barely able to keep up.

Suddenly feeling foolish, he turns his heel away from the house and starts walking. His fingers already typing out a familiar number. He presses call.

After the second ring, his call goes through. “Hey man, you busy? I just need someone to talk to…”

___

Pushing the door forward, he enters the Starbucks, letting the bittersweet aroma of roasted coffee beans enter his lungs in waves, rejuvenating his soul.

“Oi! Kuroo-chan!”

He glances up at the sound of his name, not expecting to seeing two familiar faces staring back at him. Kuroo grins, one hand coming up to wave with a quick, “Yo!”, before jutting his thumb towards the counter, indicating that he was going to order first, pleasantries later. 

Ordering a PSL, because he was a basic bitch in need of a pick me up, he makes his way back to his friends, thanking them for pulling him a seat.

“No practice, too?” Kuroo starts, glancing at the frappuccinos between them. Oikawa leans back, draping an arm around his companion’s seat. “Nah, Saturdays are usually our free days. Coach doesn’t want us overworking ourselves,” at this Lorraine snorts to which Oikawa responds with a glare, hand suddenly reaching over to latch onto the skin of her elbow and giving it a light pinching.

She swats him away, annoyed.

Kuroo fidgets in his seat until his dummy thicc booty finds a comfortable position to accommodate all that juicy (not flat) ass, leaning back, he takes a nice long sip from his cup, letting the espresso deleto his depresso.

“Kuroo-chan…” Oikawa looks at him, eyebrows raised. “Daijoubu deska?”

Kuroo sighs, shaking his head, “Could be better,” he paused, glancing at the other person at the table. Noticing his stare, Lorraine blinked back owlishly, one brow raised higher, “What,” she deadpans.

He opened his mouth, then closed it. Contemplating if he should bother, since his problems revolved around a certain someone that was near and dear to both of their hearts. But also, he doesn’t particularly want to talk about this to Christine’s friend. It was just weird. Besides, talking wasn’t their thing, despite being bros with Oikawa. Also, he knew, she would definitely text Christine right away.

Kuroo and Lorraine’s relationship was…complicatedly civil, in that there was too much history for strangers but too cynical of one another to be considered friends. They were acquaintances+ on a good day, and could technically be considered friends on better ones. They only ever interacted in a group setting and did their best to pointedly ignore each other. 

They only ever got along when they get drunk, forgetting their mutual “dislike” for each other, the things they would be giggling and whispering back and forth like children left to their own devices. But the moment they sobered up, they’d go back to being practically strangers. It was all a pride thing, for sure. All because he insulted kpop back when they dated for like a month in middle school, which honestly doesn’t count as dating at all, but how dare he think kpop was weird when he was a whole ass furry. But boy-oh-boy can she hold a grudge, even after she finally realized that kpop wasn’t all that it’s cracked up to be.

She had always been petty.

Well, whatever, not that it mattered in the grand scheme of things.

Kuroo’s inner musing was interrupted when Lorraine starts waving a hand in front of his face, calling his name, trying to gain his attention. He grabs her wrist, halting her movements.

“Yamete kuda-stop,” he says, pushing them away.

She rolls her eyes at him, “You’re the one dissociating, out of context.”

He waves his hand dismissively, “Okay fine, I might a problem...” he swallows, suddenly nervous, “Yare-yare, I need your help.”

“…Ha.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Oikawa scooting his seat closer, elbows resting on the table, leaning forwards, giving Kuroo his full and undivided attention.

Kurro balked. God, this was so embarrassing. He glances at his phone on the table, willing it to life, to give him an excuse to divert the attention away from the dumb and dumber duo.

It remains silent.

With a sigh and heavy heart, he tells them. 

__

On the other side of town, curled up under the warmth of a weighted blanket, Christine let out a series of violent sneezes. The cat that had been kneading dough on her lap, lets out an annoyed hiss before jumping off to go annoy his brother. She absently rubs her nose, to relieve some of the congestion, and mentally adding: stopping by the nearest drug store to pick up some allergy medicine, on her to do list. She focuses back to game in her hands, when the game music changed, signaling a trainer battle.

“Daijoubu deska?”

Christine looks up at the voice, before shaking her head at her friend. “Aw, Serina-chan, you do care about me. That’s so kawaii-desu! But it’s probably nothing, just allergies.”

Serina frowns at the nickname but nods, nonetheless, juice in one hand and a Switch™ on the other, using her elbow to vibe check the refrigerator door closed. She takes a step, pauses, before asking, “You sure you don’t want anything to drink? Last chance before I leave the kitchen.”

“Watashi wa daijoubudesu.”

At that, Serina nodded, shifting her Switch™ to a more comfortable grip, as she makes her way back to the living room, sidestepping to avoid kicking one of her cats, as he zoomed past her. She takes her spot on one of the couches, putting her drink down on the nearest coaster. “How far are you in the game anyway,” she says, unlocking her own device, “I’m finally battling that grandma looking guy, Bede.”

“Oh! Yeah, I’m way past that. I’m just grinding and EV training my big bad baby boy Hydreigon right now so I can one shot my enemi—” Serina lets out a sudden laugh, causing Christine to pause, and look up.

“Sorry.” More laughter. “Makoto, my leafeon, just killed the butt plug looking Pokémon. Makoto is so sugoi!”

“Sugoi! Sugoi! Makoto sugoi~” Christine chants back.

__

“…like I get that she’s like this. But it gets frustrating that one day she can go on to texting me a thesis long texts then ignoring me for days on end.” Kuroo whines into his already lukewarm coffee. Lorraine nods solemnly, “LOL mood. But honestly, you get it good because I feel like she messages you more than she does the group chat.”

“Wait, what?”

“At least she gets back to you within the next two to three business day. I feel like she puts us on mute until the weekend, because that’s weeb-time. It’s daijoubu, you’ll get used to it.”

Kuroo frowns at that, “But I don’t want to get used to it,” he whines.

“I’m sure it’s fine, shinpai shinaide,” He pouts at that, opening his mouth to complain some more when—

The movement of the swinging of the door catches Kuroo’s attention, as a familiar horned gray owl appears, “Hey, hey, heeey!” he bellows, making his way over to the group, grabbing a chair from an empty table. He fist-bumps Kuroo’s already awaiting hand with, “What’s good, my dude!”

“Great timing, as always, airhead,” Kuroo teases, “I literally just caught them up.” 

Bokuto rolls his eyes, ignoring him and focusing on the other two occupants, “Long time no see, ladies!” he said all white teeth and smiles, nodding along to their greetings, before sitting down, dropping his sports bag in front of him in a dull thud.

“Sorry, I’m late, I got held up at practice. Coach got me practicing my serves again and wouldn’t let me leave!” Bokuto pouts, flexing his bandaged fingers, “But hey, hey, heeey! I’m here and doing great.” 

Oikawa nodded in understanding, he had those nights too, of serving the ball over and over the net until he physically could not. “I would love to set for you sometime, Boku-chan~,” the other boy visibly brightens, “And Kuroo-chan can block!”

“Ho, ho, ho, that’s not a bad idea,” Bokuto says after a beat, glancing around the near empty café, he turns to the other boy, “You guys tryna go right now? We still got time, its only six-fifty-seven pm, we still got maybe a good two hours if we hurry.” he says, checking his watch then nudging at Kuroo, “It could help keep your mind off your girl,” he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.

The boy in question paused, contemplating, then agreeing. “Volleyball time?” he looks towards Oikawa, who in turn, gives Lorraine a pleading look. “Yeah, volleyball time?”  
  


Lorraine sighed, “Of course you’d abandon me for volleyball,” but she’s already moving to grab her jacket, Oikawa quickly stands too, reaching for her phone and keys, holding them out to her to take once she had finished shrugging it on. She thanks him, shoving her things in her pockets, frowning slightly up at him. Oikawa grins, leaning down to give her a quick peck on the lips, “I swear, I won’t leave you for the boys next time.” A lie but okay, she thinks, rolling her eyes.  
  


Kuroo and Bokuto get up too, fist bumping, “Hell yeah, boys’ night!”

__

After a few hours of volleyball at their local recreation center, the boys had all agreed to migrated to Kuroo’s apartment, since he was the only one with the well-stocked fridge. Adulting was hard, okay, and not everyone had a Twitch streamer and rising Youtube star as a roommate. Pushing open the door, letting the boys through, Kuroo spots Kenma in the kitchen squirreling away junk food in his arms, pausing only to greet the newcomers, before scuttling back to his room, like a goblin with his hoard of gold.

Shaking his head, Kuroo makes his way to the living room, grabbing a blanket at the edge of one of the seats and making himself comfortable at his spot on the couch. “Make yourselves at home. Sorry if it’s cold, the landlord still hasn’t turned on the heating for the whole building,” he grumbles, snuggling deeper into the blanket.

Oikawa joins him on the couch as Bokuto disappears into the kitchen to go scavenge for food.

“Oi, grab us a few beers!” Kuroo shouts, already scrolling through his Netflix account to see if there was anything good on there.

“You got it, danna,” The rattling of bottles and banging echoes throughout the apartment, before a resounding sound of the fridge door being slammed could be heard. Bokuto reappears, a half-eaten pizza slice dangling from his mouth, a box of cold pizza along with bags of chips on one hand and a six-pack in the other. Dumping their food on the coffee table in front, he shoves the rest of the pizza in his mouth, pops open one of the beers before retreating to his favorite recliner. “I also found wings, so I popped that in the oven.”

Oikawa hums in approval, reaching for two beers, handing one off to their host then claiming one of the chip bags.

Kuroo switches to Hulu, finding nothing good on the other streaming service. Bokuto let out a low whistle, “Damn dude, yamete kuda-stop calling me broke.”

Kuroo grins at that, “We have Disney\+ too, just to flex on you poors.”

“Ne, ne, all that gaming money really coming in clutch, huh, Kuroo-chan~”

“Hey, hey, do you know if Kenma need another sugar baby? I’m willing to give some sugar.”

__

Oikawa stares blearily at the clock on the wall, eyes straining to focus when the only light source was the television playing some random movie in the background. He then reaches for his phone, struggling to shove a hand down his pockets, it took a few tries before he was finally able to take it out. He stares at the camera and then again, trying different angles to get facial recognition to work but after the nth time, he settled for just typing out his passcode. He felt a nudge to his side before a shot was shoved at his face. Blinking away the blurriness from his vision, he grabs the drink, clinking glasses with the other guys before downing it, surprised at how smoothly it went down.

He hears Bokuto’s boisterous laugh somewhere to his left, where he was talking animatedly to Kenma, who had wandered into the living room towards the end of the first movie and stayed even when Kuroo suggested that they do shots. Shaking his head, he looks through his messages, mostly from his roommate, asking him where he was. With quick fingers, he types out a response, hitting send. Not even a second later, a reply came through, _Yeah, your gf told me. I’ll pick you up tomorrow. Don’t do anything stupid._ Oh, yeah, Bokuto had driven them here. He huffed, that Iwa-chan, always the worry-wart. He sends out a cursed emoji sticker then shoves his phone back in his pocket, zoning back into the conversation of Bokuto and his morning hair routine.

Oikawa peers at him closely, a hand on under his chin, face perplexed. “Ne, ne, how much gel you got going on in there, Boku-chan?” He reaches over to touch the other man’s hair, fingering the strands, surprised at how soft they were. Bokuto preens, loving the extra attention, “It’s yabe af _,_ no? It’s surprisingly not a lot, just a scoop here and there of gel then finishing it off with a touch of hairspray then I blow dry the hell out of it…”

__

A couple of beers and a few too many shots later meant sad boi hours for Kuroo. He lightly taps at his cheek just to feel something, noting that it was starting to get puffy and numb, signaling that it was time to start slowing down. He tries to stand but had to grab onto Kenma’s shoulder for balance. “’m gon git sum watrr,” he slurs mostly to himself, as he unsteadily makes his way into the kitchen. Grabbing a cup out of the cupboard, he shoves it under the water filter connected to the fridge, spilling it when his hand didn’t react fast enough to pull it away once the water reached the top.

Shit.

He looks around, noting the lack of paper towels or hand towels.

He contemplated just leaving it, because hey, it’s just water and it’ll dry eventually, no big deal, right? But then what if someone walks in and slips and dies? He couldn’t just let them die, right? Making up his drunken mind, he takes off his shirt and lays it on top of the puddle, watching as it soaks up the liquid. 

He nods to himself, convinced of doing the right thing, downs his water and makes his way back to the living room, holding on to the walls for support and finding his spot next to Kenma, who quirks an eyebrow at him, but otherwise makes no comment of his state of undress. Bokuto on the other hand, eyes raking down his naked torso comments a quick, “Heh heh nekkid,” before turning his attention back to Oikawa. Kuroo shrugs, mumbling something about buying more paper towels, before turning back into the conversation with some difficulty before giving up all together and loses himself to his own thoughts, already in his feelings.

His past insecurities were breaking through the surface. All revolving around his favorite girl.

He sighs, wistfully.

Christine always did have a lot of male friends, who were equally as in love with her as he was. It made her feel powerful, a self-proclaimed kamidere, to her underlings. She was channeling her inner Inosuke, a self-proclaimed king of the mountain. But if anyone were to ask him, she was definitely more of a tsundere, though. He still remembers when he had first asked her out. Of course, she’d agreed, but not before stuttering out a ‘But it’s not like I like you or anything, b-ba-baka!’ He remembers her cheeks reddening like crazy. Always liked having the last word, that one. He had grinned down at her, ready to tease her when she had pushed back at him in a ‘hmph!’ before turning the corner.

Ah, yes. Typical tsun-tsun behavior.

But back to the issue at hand, she would always jokingly call them her hoes, an endearment that he wasn’t overtly fond of, not that he would ever tell her. He was, for the most part confident in their relationship. She was a strong independent woman who don’t need no man, and he was fine with that. He was just willing to be there whenever she needed him.

But sometimes…he just felt a little insecure okay, maybe even jealous. It didn’t help that he was currently drunk and alone in his thoughts.

There were two other guys before him, Kuroo remembers. Work guy and England guy that she had massive crushes on. Nothing much happened with the first guy as she didn’t want to start any drama in the workplace, but things were getting somewhere with the England guy. Serina had offhandedly mention that Christine once wrote him a thirteen-thousand text message over a course of a week.

One text message.

Thirteen thousand words.

NANI?!

That’s about fifty-two pages, double spaced! How…why? What made it worse, was when the guy gifted her a fanfic, to which Kuroo was sure made her kokoro go doki-doki. She had always been a sucker for those things.

  
He let out a sigh.

He just missed his pretty girlfriend.

Kuroo was not jealous, there was no way. He considered himself to fairly attractive: tall with an athletic built, enough to garner at least a second look from girls his age. He figured he could take care of himself a little more, maybe brush his hair every once in a while, maybe even style it more, like Bokuto does. But girls dig the bad boy, emo bangs type, right?

Most would consider him a snack.

“Bro, you a whole full course meal,” Bokuto’s slurred voice breaks through the drunken haze of his consciousness.

He blinks, zoning back in. Oops, he didn’t mean to say that out loud.

“Bro…”

“Bro.”

“Itadakimasu, Kuroo-chan!”

Kenma rolls his eyes at them, sipping quietly at his lemonade, debating if he should turn in for the night.

__

Christine wakes to the sound of whining in her ear and scratches on her long curly hair. Grabbing hold of her blanket, she turns to her side, effectively shielding her whole body from the attacker, as she continued to snuggle into the warmth of her bed. She was just about to drift off again, when the culprit launched another surprise attack, this time landing his body on her head, effectively smothering her. Grumbling, she pushes her blanket away, giving Wiggles a few pats on his head to calm him down, before blindly reaching for her phone, brows shooting up when the screen brightens to reveal the number of messages and missed calls she had received the night before.

A good a hundred or so of it was from the gc screaming about Banana Fish (again), and something about Lorraine thirsting after monster Muzan, which was normal gc antics, which was pure, unadulterated sin. But what surprised her was the amount of messages from Kuroo and…was that seven missed calls? The last one had been from two hours ago, at three a.m.

“What in the nani is going on?” Christine whispers to herself, trying to remember if she’d done anything to upset him last night, but coming up with nothing. All she remembers of yesterday was playing Pokémon with Serina-chan, before she was kicked out in favor of Iwa-chan, in which she decided to go home and turning in before eight p.m. Hell, she doesn’t even remember talking or texting him yesterday or in the last few days.

Oh.

She winces.

Scrolling through the series of, mostly mopey and depressing messages, she concludes that he was with the boys, judging from a selfie he had also sent of them, drinking…tequila? Christine felt herself gag at the sight of the bottle. The devil’s juice. He was definitely gonna have a rough morning, or whatever time he decided to wake up.

Well, all she had planned was to run errands and then come home to start some new shoujo that she’s been eyeing for a few days now, but she figured she could squeeze some time out of her day to drive out to his apartment and drop off some food.

A nudge at her side followed by a miserable meow, takes her out of her musing.

Right.

But first to feed her little gremlin child.

__

Walking up the steps towards Kuroo and Kenma’s shared apartment, she pauses when she sees a familiar figure insistently knocking on the door.

“Oi, open the fuck up bakamono, its past noon!” Iwaizumi growls, pounding on the door.

“Ohayo, Iwa-chan~!” Christine greets as she nears him. The man in question jerks in surprised, not expecting to see someone else. “Yo.”

“You here for Tooru-chan, I’m guessing?” To which he nods, “Thought so! Anyways, I’m pretty sure they’re dead, but yeah I have a key, so we’re good.” Pulling out a key, she turns the knobs and slowly opens the door.

Her nose crinkles as the pungent smell of alcohol wafting around the room. She takes note of three bodies, cuddling together on the pull-out couch, dead to the world. Out of the corner of her eye she sees Iwaizumi, the veins on his head already throbbing. He grabs the closest pillow and launches it at Oikawa with a screech, hitting him square in the face.

_How feral_ , she thinks, watching as Oikawa rouses from his sleep, whining about Iwa-chan not being his mother and how much his head hurt. Iwaizumi takes one look at his miserable form before disappearing to kitchen and emerging with water and a bottle of Ibuprofen. He forces the man to sit up and drink, much to grumbling of said man. 

Huh, she thinks, I hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me.

Shaking the random thought away, she makes her way over to her own lover boy, and gently nudging at him with her knee. He groans at the sudden pressure and attempts to roll away, snuggling deeper into Bokuto’s large (beefy) back.

“Get up, you hoe,” Christine says, picking up a nearby pillow and thwacking him with it.

“Bae…no…hngg…stop…baby,” Kuroo whines, putting an arm up to shield himself from her blows, “It’s still sleepy time,” he grumbles out, voice like honey on gravel, rough from sleep but still oh-so-sexy, as he proceeds to burying his face deeper into the warm body next to him. 

“You have to eat something or you’re gonna feel terrible all day. Look I even got you a sandwich.”

Kuroo stiffened, hesitantly peering up at her from under his blanket, “You got me a sandwich?”

Christine looks at him funny, “Yeah, I got you a sandwich. It’s on the table.”

He shifts his gaze from her to the Panera bag on the table, “You got me a sandwich,” he states, pulling away from being the big spoon, then pushing himself up in a sitting position, blanket falling on his lap.

“It’s right there on the table, go get it.”

Kuroo swings his long legs over the make-shift bed, finally getting up, unsteadily. Christine’s eyes widened slightly, cheeks developing a pinkish hue, as she takes in all the exposed skin. She watches as he makes his way over to the kitchen table, eyes following the movement of his hand absentmindedly scratching at the light hairs dusting his toned stomach leading down to the waistband of his already low gray sweatpants where his— she blocks that thought, her face burning.

Christine takes a deep breath, averting her eyes to something else, anything else.

She takes note of his still flat ass.

No thoughts, head empty.

“This sandwich is for me?” he asks, hesitantly, as he peers inside the bag. “You got my texts, right? Y-you’re not m-mad at me for last night?”

“It’s f-fine, it’s my fault too,” she hopes Kuroo doesn’t take note of the slight quiver in her voice.

“You’re a literal angel,” he sniffs, “God, I love you so much,” a smile finally breaking out on his tired face and despite looking absolutely bedraggled with his hair standing on different odds and ends, she still found herself gasping for breath.

__

After that, Christine made a more conscious effort in checking her messages.

__

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

He grins leans down, left hand reaching up to grasp her chin, forcing her to look up at him as he leans down to press a wet sloppy kiss to her forehead, his other hand coming up to cup her cheek while the other moves to grasp the back of her neck, pulling her closer. She lets out an embarrassed noise, hands coming up to rest on his muscled chest to steady herself, as his lips move down to pepper kisses everywhere and anywhere on her face. She feels her eyes falling shut, as he moves to the corners of her lips, pointedly avoiding her mouth, much to her annoyance.

What a tease.

She opens her eyes to glare at him as he pulls away slightly, hands sliding down to her elbows, grasping them, to steady himself as he leans back, letting out a breathless laugh. Frustrated, she grasps the front of his shirt and pulling him back down, but forgetting to take into the account their height difference, getting the angle wrong, causing their noses to bump into each other as their teeth clash together painfully.

They both pull away to clutch at perspective noses and teeth. 

“Itaiiii...” They both said in unison. Kuroo recovers first, going to her, cupping her face, searching for signs of bruising and when finding none, he nods to himself, satisfied.

She pouts.

_Kawaii,_ Kuroo thinks, as he traces his thumb across her lower lip, licking his own to moisten them, before leaning down to kiss her, properly this time, feeling her mouth form into a smile against them. She takes a step forward, until they were chest to chest. hands moving to grasp his slim waist, taking back control by pulling him more securely towards her, to deepen the kiss.

He nips at her lips playful, wanting to add a little bit of pain along with the pleasure, but not enough to break skin. She bites back, never one to back down on a challenge, loving the feel of his soft and supple lips, running her tongue over it a few times to soothe the dull ache, then moving to properly suck on it. He gasps at how eager she was, but not wanting to complain, as horny Christine was few and far in between, he opens his mouth wider to accommodate her tongue, as it forces its way in, wasting no time in exploring the wet hot caverns of his mouth. Familiarizing herself with the taste of him as their tongues battle for dominance.

“Baby…I…nggh…bae slow…ugh…down—”, he struggles to breathe, as he lets out a throaty moan, causing her to pull away from his mouth to trail kisses down his neck, pausing only to suck at his collarbone, with full intention of leaving a mark.

He shudders.

Damn, it was getting a little _stuffy_ in here.

She loved it when he got like this, all putty in her hands, needy and a little desperate, as he lets out another whine. She lets her hands wander down lower, to firmly cup his flat ass, giving it a hard squeeze, absolutely delighted when he let out a mewl in surprise, but certainly not an unwelcomed one.

__

Christine looks at Kuroo’s most recent Amazon™ purchase, as she waits for him to get out of the shower. It was one of those picture-per-day calendars but with images of cats, placed on the end table by his bed. She rolls towards it from her comfortable position at the center of the bed, wanting a closer look, picking it up to admire it, amused that he had one of these. Noticing that it was a day behind, she flips it to today’s current date and nearly jumps out of her skin when she hears a loud, “Ah, that is a good one!” behind her. 

She turns to the sound, eyes trailing up and down his deliciously tanned naked torso, towel hung low on his hips catching the droplets of water as it dripped down from his hair, sliding across his slick expanse of skin in his poor attempts of towel drying the mess he calls hair. 

He leans in for a closer look, admiring the white little kitty cat displayed on the calendar. Christine finds herself leaning too, but towards him, taking in the scent of his 5-in-1 Irish Spring body wash. She could feel her cheeks reddening as she can feel the heat of his skin, still flushed from shower.

“Ah, gomen,” realizing that he was still, indeed, naked, “…let me put on some pants,”. He waddles to the dresser, searching through the pile, letting out an “ah hah!” and doing a quick sniff test when he finds some boxers. Checking to make sure the towel on his waist is still snug and secured, he bends over slightly to put on his underwear, putting one foot after the other. Christine tries not to stare as his normally flat ass forms a nice curve revealing a toned behind, even if it was just due to angle.

She knew the truth, anyways.

Making sure everything was in working order and tucked in the correct side, he drops the towel on the floor, kicking it aside, as he now continues his search for some pants and a shirt.

Christine gets up from his bed, to pick up his discarded towel, and heads in the bathroom connected to his room to hang it on the towel bar, to properly dry. When she pops her head back in, Kuroo, now clad in athletic shorts, is wresting an old volleyball shirt over his head, she leans against the bathroom door, amused.

“You alright there, boss?”

He huffs in annoyance, finally getting his head through, his hair an even bigger mess than before, as he works with getting his arms into the shirt. He absentmindedly runs his fingers through his hair, in an attempting to flatten down the ones that stuck up on odd ends and giving up when they refused to stay down. 

“Yes, never better,” he says, looking around for his stuff, “Ready to go?” he asks when he finds them, making a grab for his phone and wallet, shoving them in his pocket, “Bae, you got keys, right? Because I don’t know where mine went.”

“Yes, I do,” came her reply, rolling her eyes at him, as she walks out of his room to go grab her purse that she had left in the living room.

He walks past her a few moments later, heading straight for his shoes, “Well, good thing you’re here, baby girl. Because Kenma is starting to get tired of me calling him up to let me in.”

“That sucks, bro.”

__

He pulls into her driveway, killing the engine, and hopping out the car. He moves to the other side, opening the passenger side, with a, “Mi’lady,” offering his elbow at her to take. Christine rolls her eyes, but accepts the offered limb, letting herself be pulled out of the car. The short walk to her door was quiet, even as Kuroo holds open the screen door for her as she searches for her house key in her purse. She finds it and unlocks her door in a click, but doesn’t move to open it, instead she turns to face him, suddenly nervous.

Kuroo looks down at her, curious.

Christine bites her lip avoiding his eyes, fingers playing with the ends of her shirt.

“Hey, is something wron—,” his eyes widen as her hands suddenly cups both sides of his cheeks and pulled him down towards her. Her eyes were shut and her lips were soft as they met in a kiss.

He found his eyes closing too. Sighing contently, she tasted like the chocolate ice cream they had for dessert, sweet.

It went as quickly as it came, as Christine pulls away, red in the face, as she stammers a quick goodnight before rushing inside, door slamming behind her. 

Kuroo stares at the closed door for a good solid minute, still in shock, before a dopey grin makes its way to his face. He runs a hand through his already messy hair, and slaps his cheeks twice to distract himself from the pounding of his heart. 

Oh, yeah.

He’s the man.

__

Kuroo watches out of the corner of his eye, as Christine paces back and forth in his living room, visibly fuming as she recounts her day at work. Actually, she’s been doing that for the past week, coming over to vent about what happened that day, something about this co-worker not doing her job and polymers. The problem had started earlier this month, and her entire team are still having problems because one of the engineers refused to run tests.

He idly stirs at the remains of his cereal bowl, watching the contents swirl around, nodding along and grunting at the right moments, to let her know that he was listening, like the good boyfriend that he was. He tilts the rest of bowl onto his awaiting lips, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand with a grin. Ah, yes, delicious.

“Are you even listening to me?”

“Of course, my love.”

She eyes him suspiciously, arms folding, to which Kuroo returns with a what he hopes is a genuine smile. He gets up, wiping his hands on his jeans for good measure, before take two long strides to meet her, grabbing hold of her shoulders and giving her a little shake, before letting them slide down until he reaches her hands, filling the spaces between her fingers with his own, where they fit perfectly. He plants a tiny feather-light kiss on the tip of her nose, and laughs when she wrinkles it. “You are stressed,” he says, unhelpfully.

“Yeah, no shit—” Kuroo puts a finger against her lips, effectively shushing her. Christine tries to nip at the offending finger, but his reflexes were too fast.

“Which means,” he continues like he hadn’t just been interrupted, “it’s anime time.”

“But—,”

“We can watch Orange. Today I’ll allow it. Even when you only gave it a five out of ten on MAL.”

“Hmph!”

__

Christine balls her hands into tiny fists, growing more frustrated at his shit-eating-grin, shaking her head in disbelief, she starts pounding on his well-defined chest, screaming, “Baka, baka, Tetsuro-baka!” over and over again. Getting more and more agitated when she feels him shaking with laughter at every hit.

He wraps his much larger hands over hers, stilling her movements, which angers her more, using her momentum to pull her forward onto his chest, trapping her there. Her breath hitches when she feels him draw closer, eyes fluttering shut, as his nose tickles at her jaw, nuzzling at the skin there, taking in her scent. Her skin feels like it’s on fire when she feels him start trailing feather-light kisses until it reaches her lips, where he leaves soft barely-there kiss, before pulling away to put some distance between them. She tries to follow him, moving to her tip-toes, craving more of him, lips barely grazing his stubbled chin as he stands at full height.

She pouts up at him, “Tetsuro-baka,” to which he responds by giving her a playful wink.

Christine suddenly goes shy, turning away sharply, refusing to meet his eye and instead focusing it on the wall next to them, as if there was something more interesting than the man in front of her, leaving Kuroo to smile at her back, _kawaii-desu_ , he thinks, as he takes her in; from her furrowed brows to her pouty lips, slightly quivering.

“Ah, there’s my favorite tsun-tsun, I was wondering where she went,” he drawls, loving the way she immediately turns to glare at him.

Feisty.

“Hey! What did you just call me, Tetsuro-boke!”

He snickers lightly, drawing her close to him, lightly touching his nose to hers in an eskimo-kiss.

Ignoring her obvious red face, she shoves at his chest, needing to put as much distance between them as possible. She needed to focus and he was distracting her, with that stupid face and that stupid mouth and that— _focus._

“ _How much money did you lose, again?”_

Now it was Kuroo’s turn to look away, guiltily. She frowns, trying to catch his eyes.

“I wanted to impress you, okay?” he mumbles, after a moment, a light blush dusting his cheeks.

Christine frowns, feeling slightly conflicted. On one hand, he was technically being sweet for indulging in one of her current favorite past times: investing in the stock market. But on the other hand, he did _lose_ three thousand dollars by putting it in the Pet Industry.

“Why didn’t you talk to me about it?”

“Because save the turtles, Christine!”

__

On quiet days, he likes to watch her when she works, loving her the way her eyes would narrow, burning holes in the screen as she typed or when her mouth forms a thin line when something doesn’t particularly go in her favor. The way her glasses were slowly slipping off her nose bit by bit, but doesn’t seem to bother her or maybe it was the way her messy bun was slowly coming apart as the hours go by. He notices all of this from his perch on the kitchen table, left hand circling around the mug of hot tea that he sips from, ever so often.

She glances up when she feels his gaze linger for a moment too long, raising one brow, asking a silent question. He shakes his head, as if to say ‘don’t worry about it’. Christine narrows her eyes at him, suspicious, bringing her two fingers towards her eye in and then back at him in a ‘I’m watching you’ motion, to which he gladly returns.

Turning back to his open laptop, he focuses back on the screen, watching the protagonist fight his estranged rival/best friend, and maybe even lover? He doesn’t know, but the dialogue between them sounded more like one between lovers than just friends.

He hears soft padding of feet, a shadow suddenly casting over him, as an arm snakes across his shoulders, the sudden weight causing him to straighten his back on the seat to avoid both of them from toppling over.

“Oh, no, not you too,” her voice tickles at his ear.

“Huh?”

“Literally everyone is watching Naruto,” She lets out a sigh, “You weebs need to find a better show.”

He shrugs, not wanting to get into an anime debate over Naruto, “Anyway, how far did you get on that AMV?”

“Well, I got the clips…” Kuroo nods along, urging her to go on, “And that’s basically it.”

“Excuse me?”

Christine looks away, “AMVs are hard, okay?”

He opens his mouth, then closes it, not knowing what to say because he never tried making one.

“Bae?” he says after a thought, “Do you think you can make a Naruto AMV?”

“Go ask Serina-chan, babe.”

__

Serina had her fair share of crushes, which she categorizes into a two-end spectrum, ranging from feral to Makoto, an anime boy from some swimming anime. Even as the years had gone by, Makoto had been a never-ending constant. She had tried (and failed) to stop comparing boys that she’d met irl to her ideal fictional man, because if we were honest with ourselves, men tend to be disappointing. She really needed to lower her standards, just a tiny bit.

She had almost given up, too, because at this point, 2D was better than 3D, and science has not yet made husbandos a reality. Press f to pay respects because ya girl strugglin’. And while she might not feel any sexual attraction towards them, dammit men were pretty and sometimes she just wants to hold their hand. >:(

That’s why her friends kept teasing her when she met Hajime. Which was a complete accident, thankyouverymuch. A nice easygoing friendship had developed between the two, surprising them. It pure coincidental, all stemming from their love of small lizards and Godzilla. Although she regrets sometimes that the attraction wasn’t stemmed from marine life (I’m looking at you Kisame and Gang Orca), but hey, she wasn’t going to complain.

And thus, a friends to lovers au was born.

Serina didn’t think much of it, if she was being honest with herself. Although, she had to admit that he was somewhat of an outlier, not falling under the soft boi sub-category of her Makoto-end of the spectrum, that she would have preferred. But feral was nice too.

Hajime was all hard lines and angles, the ruggedly handsome type. He was athletic, but not overtly muscular, just a hint of abs that suggest that he keeps his body in good condition, but even that disappears on days that when he’s eaten a little too much agedashi tofu. He was tall, well taller than her, which she liked because height difference, sue her okay, but she never really cared much about those things, as long as the guy was taller than her, it was fine. Hajime always complained about it though, as he was just a few inches’ shy from six feet. Something about men and sizes (it also didn’t help that Oikawa teases him about it). Eto, but now that she thinks about it, Serina always found herself drawn to his arms time and time again, especially when he rolls his sleeves up, revealing strong forearms to go along with his delicious toned biceps. He had confessed to her that earlier on in their relationship that if he could, he’d only work out his arms because he hated any form of cardio and strength training really helped tone him up real good, so—

She blinked in quick successions, squinting slightly to adjust her eyes to the dim light of the television against the darkened room. She jumped slightly, at the feeling of fur suddenly brushing against her arm, looking down to see her cat, Maui, chirping beside her, making himself comfortable on the couch. She finds herself smiling, hand coming down to give him a scratch, to which he responded by snuggling closer to the warmth of her hand.

A laugh beside her causes her to look up, just in time to see to see her other cat, Killua, jump into Hajime’s lap. The gray feline then proceeded to shove his tiny head into Hajime’s awaiting hand, wanting to be given all the love and scratches he deserved and the man was more than willing to give it to him.

Oh.

Wow.

She was in love-love.

He hot.

Nothing hits different than a man who loves cats.

__

“So, thoughts? Was this better than the first movie or nah?” Lorraine asks, grabbing on to the crook of Oikawa’s elbow, the antecubital space, letting him pull her along as the group makes their way towards the exits.

“That sure was a good cartoon,” Kuroo muses, “Normally I don’t like these things, unless they involve animals, like that cat boy and bug girl that Christine-chan likes…but that animation was something else!” Christine looks affronted by this confession, and tries to pull away from their joint limbs, but Kuroo holds her down fast, refusing to let her escape and just to annoy her even further, puts her into a headlock, refusing to let go as she struggles against his hold. She tries and fails to elbow his side, as he just sidesteps away, laughing the entire time.

She lets out an irritated noise, settling for stepping on his prized brand new white shoes. He abruptly let’s go, pushing her away to lean down and brush the dirt from them, frowning. “Why would you do that?”

Christine makes a “tch,” sound, “To test my abilities, obviously”, looking down at her boy-toy, letting her kamidere side take over. Kuroo just rolls his eyes, getting up and poking at her ribs and complaining that she was too skinny and something about wanting a girl with an ultra thicc ass. She counters by saying that his ass was so flat, she couldn’t tell where his back and legs began and ended. She then proceeds to prod at the offending muscle, demanding to be shown the goods.

Serina leans over Hajime, eyeing the bickering couple. She opens her mouth to say something before closing it after deciding that she should just leave them alone.

“Anyway…anyone else heard that leather comment?” Lorraine laughs, looking around at the group, “Honestly made my day.”

“Urasai, you trash, don’t say that. There’s kids around.” Serina says, giving her the stink-eye.

“Fuck them kids, man.” Lorraine deadpans, shaking her head. Oikawa laughs beside her, in agreement.

“You noticed that, too! God, I kept elbowing Christine-chan, but it went right over her head.” Kuroo jumps in, eye’s bright with mirth.

They high-fived.

“Maji ka! You guys are so trash,” Christine says, rolling her eyes.

“I liked the fire salamander,” Iwaizumi supplies, “He was very kawaii-desu.” Serina nods along, that was one of her favorite part of the movie. “The music was very sugoi, too,” Serina adds, “I’m gonna make an AMV out of that Panic! cover.”

“Not if I make one first, Serina-chan!” Christine quips, “I dissociated to Dragon Prince, when I heard it play.”

Lorraine frowns, realizing that the moment to bring up the rock men tiddies had passed. Now it’d just be weird, if she brought it up. She looks up when she feels a slight tap on her hand, Oikawa looks down at her, brow half raised in question, she shakes her head, mouthing ‘later’, to which he nods.

“Anyways, this was fun ladies, but Tetsu-chan and I have errands to run, so we’ll head out first. Sayonara, hoes.” Christine says, walking away. Kuroo gives the group a quick wave before jogging after her, to the direction they had parked.

Serina watches them, as Kuroo catches up, pulling at the crook of her elbow, watching as Christine stumbles backwards, until she bumps into Kuroo’s solid chest. He uses this opportunity to swings his arm around to drape it across her shoulders, pulling her close. In turn, she responds by wrapping an arm around his skinny torso, grasping the side of his loose T-shirt, leaning her head against his shoulder. He grins down at her, satisfied, pressing a kiss to her hair.

“Oh, well in that case, we gotta go too.” Lorraine’s voice filters through her ears, “Tooru was up all night watching recordings of yesterday’s match and is currently only running on energy drinks and coffee.” Oikawa huffs at that, not liking being called out like this. “I’m fine, it’s nothing—” he tries to stress, only to be interrupted by Iwaizumi saying “Go home, Trashykawa and get some sleep or I’ll knock you out myself.”

“Iwa-chan, so mean!” Oikawa pouts, not liking being ganged up by his precious people, feeling the fight drain out of him. He lets out a ‘hmph!’, letting them know that he was annoyed before stomping away like a kid being denied candy at the candy store, but not before saying a quick, “Ja ne!”, because his momma didn’t raise a delinquent.

Lorraine watches him go, already used to his antics, rolling her eyes. What a brat. “Ight, we out. Ja, guys.”

“Okay, bye,” came Serina’s reply, at the same time Iwaizumi says, “Later.” The duo watched their friends disappear behind a row of cars. Serina refocuses her attention when Hajime grab her hand, intertwining their fingers, feeling the familiar warmth blossom in her cheeks at the sudden display of affection. He smiles in a way that makes her heart flutter, that doesn’t help relieve the embarrassment that she already feels.

He pulls her toward the car, “Let’s get some Steak n’ Shake, I’m starving.”

“Oh yeah, I could go for a shake.”

__

Pulling into her driveway, she takes notes of the lack of cars. Oh, good, mom’s at Franks and Magnus got lost on his five-minute drive home from work. She was glad for some privacy, she casts a quick glance at the man beside her, watching as he tries to sing along to Into the Unknown, as it plays on the speakers, he wasn’t terrible but he wasn’t all that great either.

Putting the car in park, she unlocks the door to her house to cats rushing at her feet, demanding attention. She reaches down to scratch Maui’s ear, to his delighted purrs, before moving along and giving his brother some lovin’ too. Iwaizumi takes this golden opportunity to smack her ass as he squeezes past her, laughing at her indignant ‘Hey!’, pausing only to take off his shoes and heading to the kitchen to get a drink of water then migrating to the couch, making himself at home. She walks in, a moment later, glaring at him, as he gives her an innocent smile, followed by a wink, before fixing his gaze back to his phone, scrolling through its contents. She rolls her eyes, grabbing her laptop from where she had previously left it on the floor the night before and pulling up animeshow.tv.

“So, what are we watching?” he asked, glancing up, thumb still scrolling through his feed.

“Depends, are you caught up with your weekly shows?” she asks, scrolling through, trying to prioritize which of her weekly animes does she need to watch. “I’m fine with whatever,” he shrugs.

“Don’t say that, because I can watch anything,” she says, looking at him expectantly.

“Serina…”

“Hajime.”

“…I feel like I always pick, though,” he says after a pause, pulling at one of the blankets at the end of the couch and draping it around himself, “I want you to pick.”

“But you’re the guest and—,”

“Hardly, and beside you’re the one with an actual list of things to watch. I’m just here vibin.”

Serina sighs, “Well, I guess, we can watch Boruto.”

Hajime groans, “I’d rather not.”

“What, why?”

“It’s just…not sugoi,” he mutters under his breath, shifting to a side-lying position and securing the blanket along his body.

“I mean you’re not wrong,” she says, “But I need to see Sasuke.”

Hajime just rolls his eyes, as Serina press play, adjusting the screen so the cursor doesn’t hover over the play button. Once satisfied, she makes her way to the couches where Iwaizumi opens his arms to her, invitingly. She stares at his awaiting arms, then at the blanket barely covering his large form because there was no way that blanket was going to cover both of them, before turning back and grabbing her own blanket, draping it over herself and settling into his arms, trying to find a comfortable position that won’t give herself a stiff neck. She can feel Hajime’s light breathing at the base of her neck. Feeling his fingers making their way up, to comb back some loose strands of her short hair behind her ear, so it doesn’t tickle his nose. He presses a quick kiss to at the junction where her neck meets the shoulder, laughing softly as goosebumps erupted on her skin. He grins, satisfied, then proceeds to bury his face into her hair, inhaling the scent of her.

His right-hand trails down the length of her arm, giving her bicep a light squeeze, before finally settling around her waist, pulling her closer to his chest, their bodies aligned, legs tangling under the sheets.

Serina sighs contently, despite the blood pumping in her ears. She could feel him shift behind her, trying to find a more comfortable position, without jostling them too much. She can feel his fingers absentmindedly playing with the end of her shirt, skin accidently brushing the pale skin underneath. For a moment, he hesitates, before shrugging and letting his hands wander underneath her shirt, fingers lightly tracing circles on her bare, soft skin. Serina tries to control the sound of her breathing, which had significantly picked up by the sudden turn of events, before doubling her efforts to focus on what was happening on screen in front of her. Her favorite bi disaster and LGBT icon, Sasuke Uchiha, was on screen.

Noticing the lack of resistance, he starts peppering kisses at the shell of her ear, working his way down to the base of her neck, taking delight at hearing her take a sudden intake of breath. He grins to himself, satisfied, before pulling away to give her space to breath and collect herself, and before she decides to elbows him in the gut.

She did tend to have a mean right hook when she wanted to.

When it was evident that no harm was coming his way, he snuggles back into her hair, stifling a yawn. He drowns out the sound of what he thinks is Sasuke getting his ass beat again and focuses instead at the steady rhythm of her heart lulling him to sleep.

__

Hajime wakes up and immediately notices two things: one, his nose was buried in long gray fur, as one of the cats had decided that his face was the perfect place to take a nap on and two, it was dark out. Resisting the urge to sneeze, he brings both hands up to slowly detach the furry little guy, supporting his head, making sure not to awaken him from his deep slumber. He sits up and stretches, trying to relieve the crick on his neck from sleeping on the couch for more than a few hours.

Looking around, he notes that the television was turned off and the only light source in the living room was his girlfriend’s laptop on the recliner next to him, without said girlfriend. He shrugs it off, making his way into the kitchen to get some water, to quench his thirst.

“Oh! You’re awake. Good, I was going to ask about dinner.”

He jumps, choking slightly mid gulp, at the sudden sound coming from his left. He sputters a few times, as some of the water had made its way into the wrong pipe and into his nose. His hand reaching for a paper towel to blow into.

“Woah, are you okay?” Serina’s worried face appears in front of him, after several swipes at his nose.

He coughs for good measure, “Never better,” he says wheezes, tossing away the used tissue. Clearing his throat, to reassure himself that he is not, indeed, dying, he leans against the counter, attempting to play it cool, and turns to face her, “You said something about dinner?”

Serina shrugs, “Yeah, it’s starting to get late, and there’s like nothing to eat here, so I just figured that we could get take out.”

Hajime nods, “Anything you had in mind?”

He watches as her face drops, “Well, I was hoping you’d pick,” she says, sheepishly. He chuckles at her, _of course_.

“Come on, Serina-chan,” he says mockingly, “I always pick and—,” “But that’s because we usually like the same things!” “—I think it’s time that you make up your mind young lady.”

She frowns at him, “What are you, my mom?”

Hajime groans at that, “Never say that to me again, ugh, first Assykawa, not you too!” She shrugs at him, “You are the mom-friend.” He doesn’t argue with her on that.

“Anyways, where we eating? Because some places are start to close at nine pm.” He looks at her pointedly, waiting for her to get what he was throwing down. She stares back at him, in confusion, before eyes widening in surprise, lips forming an “O”.

She clears her throat, coming around the kitchen island, to lean against the counter next to him to lean on. “Panera always sounds good.”

“That’s my girl.” She elbows him good naturally, then whips out her phone, loading up the app. “What do you want?”

__

Fifteen minute later, they were back in her living room. Serina was on couch, happily munching on her sandwich, fiddling with her laptop on the recliner while Hajime was on the couch, responding to his messages, stuffing his face with lettuce.

“Hey, Hajime?” He looks up at the call of his name, mouth hanging open, mid-chew, “You wanna see what I’ve been working on?”

“What is it?” he asks, curious, swallowing the rest of his salad. She shrugs, “I finally finished that Banana Fish AMV.”

“Really? That’s great! You’ve been complaining about how annoying layering it together had been,” he says thoughtfully, stabbing at his salad.

“Yeah, I just couldn’t seem to get it to transition just where I wanted it to…but I fixed it, for the most part.” Hajime nods, to show that he was listening, “You want me to hook it up to the TV or are we just watching from your laptop?” Serina stops to think about it for a second, “Can you?” she asks, handing the laptop over to him to plug into the HDMI cord, then presses play.

Of Monsters and Men start playing to a clip of a blond anime boy walking in the snow, alone. He knows this guy’s name, Ash something, the snow leopard guy, watching as scene after scene in near perfect transition plays.

_Wow_ , he thinks, she did a really good job with this.

Before dating Serina, Hajime didn’t really care for AMVs that much, he’s seen them floating around on Youtube and he’s caught his best friend and roommate watching them from time to time, but he never understood all the time and effort it took to making one. He’d always just figured, get the clip and put music over it and that’s all there was to it. But watching Serina wait hours and hours to download every episode and then use only a few seconds out of the entire episode to piece together each AMV, gave him a newfound respect for them.

Hell, she even got her friends in on the crazy. Though, both don’t work on them as much as his girl did, they still did it often enough to do AMV exchanges and were very supportive of one another. Now that he thinks of it, Shittykawa had asked him to bring her over sometime soon because he wanted to be taught by the great AMV-sensei herself.

He watches as the video fades to black, and turns to her saying, “That was so good! How long did it take you to make that?”

Serina visibly brightens at the praise, happy that it was well received by her number one fan, “Oh god, I started working on that maybe like a month ago? Then I stopped because I’ve been busy and had so many other side projects that I also wanted to work on, so this kept getting pushed back, until I forced myself to sit down and do it yesterday and today…but thank you! I’m so glad you like it.” Her eyes sparking as she smiles that beautiful smile at him.

“Y-you’re welcome,” he looks away first, cheeks warms.

__

It was well past midnight when Iwaizumi walked in on Oikawa and his girlfriend making out on their living room couch, the only light sources was from the television playing some Netflix Original. The couple jump apart at the sound of the door opening, like deer caught in headlights.

“Ah, gomen,” he says, quickly taking off his shoes, pointedly looking away from their disheveled forms, making a beeline for his room and slamming the door shut.

Oh, god.

It was quiet for a moment, before he hears an obnoxious laugh resounding throughout the apartment, followed by shushing and a slap.

“Mean!”

“I better go.”

“No, wait stay. Iwa-chan’s not gonna come out anytime soon, we could continue this in my room, eh?”

“It late.” Iwaizumi could almost picture his roommate pouting at those words.

“That’s never stopped you before.”

“And you get pretty loud when you’re excited, babe. Let the poor man sleep, hm?” Iwaizumi doesn’t like what she’s implying. “—yo-na-ra, Tooru-kun~”

“Fine, but I don’t like it.”

He hears shuffling, then silence.

He narrows his eyes suspiciously.

“Mwah!” he gags at that clearly exaggerated sound of smacking lips, followed by a poorly concealed giggle, “Lemme walk you out, then.”

More shuffling then the sound of the door opening and closing.

Then silence.

He felt a shiver go down his spine, trying to bleach his mind from what he had witnessed in the past ten minutes as he stumbles around his room blindly, not bothering to turn on the lights. He strips out of his day clothes, tossing them into his laundry hamper and then moving onto his dresser, to rummage for a clean pair of underwear then diving under the covers. He out by the time his head hits the pillow.

__

Iwaizumi peers down the line of cars as he circles around the lot, looking for an empty spot. Serina is seated beside him, humming along to a song by Burnout Syndromes, as she furiously types on her phone. He glances at her, noting the familiar icon of the sin gc, refocusing back at the task at hand, just in time to see a car pull out of a spot. Oh, hell yeah.

He exits the car, pats his pockets, and double checks at the cup holders see if he had left anything behind before slamming the door shut. He hears Serina shuffling over to meet him, extending his right hand towards her to take, the other busy fumbling with the keys to lock the door. At the sound of two consecutive beeps, he nods to himself, adjusting the grip on his girl’s hand, and pulling her along to the entrances.

Once inside, she lets go of his hand, eyes still staring intently at her phone, as she uses both hands to type out what seemed to be an aggressive response. Hajime stares at her, shrugs, placing a hand around her shoulders guiding her to where they had needed to go.

Shoes.

She had asked him the night before if he wanted to go shoe shopping with her, promising that it wouldn’t take more than five-minutes. He had shrugged, not really having plans for the day other than working out at the gym, some cleaning around the apartment, and maybe meet up with some old high school friends that were in town, if they ever decide on a time for dinner. Iwaizumi had joined Oikawa in his morning run earlier, much to the other’s delight, and started cleaning the apartment once the other boy left for volleyball practice which had cleared up his afternoon for her.

Serina leans into him, allow him to guide her out of the department store from which they came from, glancing up every once in a while, to make sure she doesn’t bump into anything, not that she will of course. Hajime, ever the gentleman, would not let that happen, until he actual does. So, he’s not allowed to catch her slippin’.

Walking into the Shoe Dept.™, Serina walks towards the row of Sketchers ™, with confident strides, as she locks her eyes on one of the shoes. Hajime trudges along behind her, slowing down his pace as he eyes the wall of Nikes™, and contemplating if he needed a new pair before immediately shooting down that thought. He had just ordered some Nike Air Foamposite One Big Bang, that should be coming in any day now, he couldn’t rationalize getting two sneakers within a week from each other because he’d go broke, he muses, turning his attention back at his girl to see her trying on the shoes that she liked, nodding to herself, pleased.

  
By the time he had reached her, she had boxed the shoes, saying she was ‘Ready,’ and walked off towards the register. He stares after her blankly.

Excuse me?

He blinks at her, confused at how fast she had chosen her shoes. She probably did some research beforehand, he figured, as he makes his way to the front of the store to wait for her as she pays. He does that too sometimes, looks at them online then checking them out instore, but he always takes the time to compare it to the other displays.

Huh. That was the fastest he had been in and out of a shoe store in years.

Serina bumps elbows with him lightly, signaling that she was good to go. He gives her a funny look to which she only laughs at, letting him ease out the shopping bag out from her grasp, freeing her hand and allowing him to intertwine them. “You’re weird,” he says, shaking his head, “Where to next?”

__

Hajime makes sure to stop by the Starbuck™ drive-thru before dropping Serina off at her house. Pulling up to the store’s speakers, he orders her a Pumpkin Spiced Frappuccino and an Iced Passion Tango ™ Tea Lemonade for himself. Serina looked at him, like he had just put up the stars in the sky, when he handed her the drink. “I’ll pay you back,” she says, rummaging through her bag, looking for her wallet to give him a five. He shakes his head, “Just get the next one,” he says to her. Serina pauses in her search, contemplating, “Yeah, you right,” she says after a moment, sipping happily at her drink.

She feels her phone vibrating in her lap, Hajime takes notice and asks, “You guys hanging after this?” “Yeah, we haven’t had weeb-time in forever.” He nods in understanding, pulling into her the driveway and putting the car in park. Serina unbuckles her seatbelt, leaning over the middle to meet him halfway for chaste kiss, she pulls away slightly, giggling as he follows after her lips, trying to go in for another, which she happily obliged.

She liked kissing Hajime, it was nice.

He was nice.

A knock on her passenger window caused her to jump and pull away, embarrassed. Whipping her head around, she sees Christine’s cheshire smiling face, pressed up against the glass.

Christ Almighty.

She could feel herself turning red like Sasuke’s favorite fruit, beside her Hajime laughs taking it all in stride, bring up a hand to acknowledge Christine.

Serina mumbles a quick goodbye, gathering all her stuff and exiting the vehicle. She ignores Christine waggling eyebrows as she moves to unlock her door. She hears Christine say goodbye to Hajime, and only looking back to see him back out of her driveway slowing down for a second for one last wave before driving off.

“Things were getting a little steamy in there, huh.” Christine comments, trying and failing to conceal her laughs.

“Die.”

__

Lorraine arrives eventually, late as always. Walking up the steps to Serina’s house, she rings the doorbell and waits. She hears voices coming closer and could somewhat make out a silhouette or two on the other side of door’s glass.

A pause.

She rings the doorbell again. It opens to Christine frowning, “You should’ve just walked in, they never lock their doors!” while Serina hovers in the behind her, with a triumphant look on her face. Lorraine blinks at her, “But that’s rude.”

“Ha! I told you!”

“It’s not because we know each other…it’d save a lot of time and—you know what, whatever,” Christine drops it, knowing she was outnumbered. “Anyway, you’d never guess what I saw when I got here,” she says a devious glint, reaching her eyes, grinning mischievously. Lorraine leans forward, very interested. “So here I was, pulling up to Serina-chan’s house, all innocent, you know? And what do I see?”

“What!”

“Her and Iwa-chan making out in his car!”

“Omg!”

The two busted out laughing, as Serina tries to think of a way to counter that statement. “Stop that!” she tries, leading to her friends laughing harder, “It wasn’t like that!”

Christine sniffs, pretending to wipe a stray tear from her eye, “My Serina-chan, all grown up <3”

“Don’t like that.”

__

“I wish he had a big heart and an even bigger meat,” Lorraine sighs into her sandwich, “but sadly he’s just average.” Christine frowns at her, while Serina chokes on her salad. “Press f to pay respects.”

“Please stop, for my sanity,” once the piece of chicken had dislodged itself from her throat.

“Don’t say that about my son, I did not need to know that.” Christine says, trying to block that thought process.

“Don’t go around calling adult males your son, please,” Lorraine gives Christine a look, “Stop with those incestuous thoughts right now.”

Serina laughs.

“But he baby,” Christine insists. Oikawa and her have always gotten along really well, to the point where they both project their feelings unto one other. They were very similar personality-wise: a hardworking, fake-smiling, affection-starved, with a dash of pettiness and sprinkled on with a touch of anxiety. Even though, Oikawa was technically older than her, that didn’t stop her from asserting her dominance, her kamidere side, if you will, onto others.

“He is baby,” Lorraine says in agreement, “Anyway, you did good with Iwaizumi-san, Serina.”

“Die.”

Ignoring her, Lorraine continues, “Oikawa told me and I quote, ‘Iwa-chan’s bread is a baguette!’”

Serina tried to take a deep calming breath, trying to center herself.

Don’t kill her, she’s your friend.

Don’t kill her, she’s your friend.

Don’t kill her, she’s your friend.

“Oh my god, I knew it!” came Christine’s loud voice, fist pumping.

“Nani?”

“His shoes, Serina-chan, they’re huge,” she says like it was the most obvious thing in the world, “And you know what they say about big shoes—,” “Don’t you dare finish that sentence!” “—big feet!” Christine finishes dissolve in a fit of laugher that Lorraine joins in a second later.

Don’t kill them, they’re your friends.

Don’t kill them, they’re your friends.

Don’t kill them, they’re your friends.

__

Serina couldn’t look Hajime in the eye, the next time she sees him.

No other thoughts, just Hajime with a big peen.

__

He definitely notices, but tries not to say anything.

__

“Daijoubo desu ka?” Hajime asks after he catches her eye for the nth time in the past hour that they had been chilling in her room. He notices that her face immediately turns red, before shift her gaze to her Makoto in a sailor outfit figurine, her lord and savior.

“Yare-yare, stop ignoring me for Makoto,” he scoots closer to her, brows raised when she shifts back, just a little. “Okay, now you have to tell me. You’re obviously embarrassed about something. Come on, Serina, relationships mean twice the secrets!”

Serina takes one look at him, before burying her face to the nearest pillow and screaming.

Hajime sighs, “Is this because I found your makoharu fanfics?” she frowns but shakes her head. “Is it because I found out you liked big tiddied shark men like Gang Orca and Kissanime?” Serina flinches at those words, but again shakes her head.

“…is it me? Is it because my tiddies aren’t as big?” When she doesn’t respond, Hajime sighs, pulling at her arms that were still wrapped around the pillow, making her let go. She tries to resist, but he was stronger than her (from working out those delicious arms, itadakimasu), more or less dragging her to his side, so that they were lying face to face. His larger hands enclosing her smaller ones as he brings them to his lips and planting a kiss on both of them. She looks away, burying her face on the pillow, speaking into it, muffling the sound.

“What.” More muffling. “Come again.” Serina glances at him, his face a little too close for her liking for what she was about to say. She puts some distance between them. He lets her, concerned marring his beautiful face. 

After a breath, she says, “Lorraine said you have a big…” Her voice drops to a whisper, “…dick.”

His brows shot up past the fringes of his hair. “…and how would she even know…Assykawa.”

Serina nods slowly, still avoiding his eyes, “And Christine figured it out through your shoe size.”

He sighs, “And here I thought it was something bad,” he moves to cover the distance between them, pulling her into his big strong arms, tucking her head under his chin, one of his hands immediately goes to play with her hair, “Well, if you must know, it’s better than most.” She stiffens against his hold, and he laughs as he feels her body suddenly go warm. 

“You know we don’t have to anything, if you don’t want to.”

“Hajime-kun…”

“I won’t pressure you or anything,” he whispers, cheeks coloring slightly at her sudden use of an honorfic, drawing her even closer to plant a soft kiss her forehead, backing away slightly giving her an option to pull away.

She doesn’t.

Instead she moves closer until their foreheads touch, eyes fluttering close, breathing in his masculine scent. “I know.”

__

Serina frowns as she looks up at the screen again, as the pictures she was dragging around refuse to cooperate. She jumps slightly when she feels Hajime’s hair brush her elbow, as he crawls closer towards her, leaning his face against her arm, trying to have a better look what she was doing.

“Do I even want to know?” his voice rumbles, looking up at her from his prone position on the floor. He blinks a couple of times, trying to make sense of the shapes on screen, “Are…are you making summoning circle for Makoto using anime boys?”

Serina huffs, “It’s art, you wouldn’t understand.”

Hajime looks at her, searching her eyes, pondering, before saying, “Would you be mad if I made an anime girls spectrum?”

“No, why?”

He shrugs, “Just checking.”

“What would even be on there—,”

“Tiddies.”

“Ah, I see you’re a man of culture as well,” Serina says in approval.

At that moment, Magnus, Serina’s younger brother, walks in from the basement. He takes one look at the two then at the contents on the television on full display, because for some reason, Serina was too lazy to unplug her laptop from the HDMI cable from when they were watching anime earlier.

“What are you making, you trash?” Magnus sneers, eyes full of judgement, “Why is that Makoto-guy in the center?”

Serina frowns, “Hey-uh, make your own damn spectrum.”

“Why the fuck would I do that?”

“I want to know you’re waifus.”

“Whatever,” rolling his eyes, Magnus proceeds to rummage through the fridge, grabbing whatever he could find. “Hey, did you know that hentai has a better plot than that garbage that you watch?” Magnus says aloud, as he pours himself some juice and starts heating something up in the microwave.

Serina looks up at him in disbelief. “Excuse me? No wait—I don’t want to know.”

Hajime coughs awkwardly, slightly intrigued, but tries to not make it obvious.

“Yeah the MC, goes to save this girl, well he fucks her obviously, but then he goes on this quest to defeat this guy and yeah it’s so much better than whatever it is you’re watching.”

“No.”

“Whatever, bitch,” Magnus says, voice fading as he retreats back into the basement, meal in hand.

“Bye Magnus.”

After a moment, Hajime breaks the silence, “That…that sure was something.”

Serina gives him a disgusted look, clearly judging him. “Trash. You’re gonna look that up, huh?”

“I…I have _needs,_ okay!” he stutters out defensively.

__

“Pause,” she says in between laughs, “So let me get this straight, you two watched this medieval hentai… _together?”_

Oikawa crossed his arms, suddenly defensive, “Y-yeah! And it was good!”

Lorraine snorts, “Just bros being bros, I guess.”

“Ne, ne, it’s not like we haven’t watched any of those together, too!”

“Babe, we’re dating, so it’s not weird.”

“Well, this isn’t weird either!” he says, affronted.

She gives him a look, “Not even a little?” quirking a brow up, challengingly.

“I…it’s not!”

She shrugs, “Whatever you do with your bestie is none of my business.”

“Chotto matte…you’re not listening to meeeee!”

“Go off bisexual king. I have no choice but to stan.”

**Author's Note:**

> i'm not sorry


End file.
